Protecting Your Children During Divorce
A Family Research Council study on the Effects of Divorce on Children would lead anyone to believe that every child of divorce faces a tragic future. Without a doubt, parents need to focus on the wellbeing of their children from the time they decide to file for divorce through every step of the divorce process and probably for the rest of their lives.
Each Dallas divorce attorney at GoransonBain Ausley is dedicated to protecting the entire family as we guide couples through this highly-emotional process.
Avoiding Conflict During Divorce Helps Children Foresee a Brighter Future
Parents need to recognize that the children did not cause the conflict that led to divorce. Younger children may not even fully understand what is happening any more than they can predict what their futures will hold. Older children may not fare much better. We recommend that parents take specific actions to help ease the stress:
- Choose a non-adversarial divorce method: When couples view divorce as a contract issue more than a personal one, they realize they can negotiate the terms in a civilized way. Whenever possible, experienced divorce attorneys usually recommend some form of uncontested divorce as a better option for the majority of couples because they are less continuous conflictive in nature. Collaborative divorce is probably the most cooperative form of divorce when it comes to displaying a supportive spirit in front of the children.
- Encourage conversation: It is generally best when both parents can inform the children about the divorce and invite them to ask questions whenever they come up. The longer the kids think about the situation, the more concerns they will have, ranging from why the divorce is necessary to what they can do to fix the issues. Both parents should remain available to answer all questions — always making sure the children are secure in parental love and that they know they did not cause the divorce.
- Avoid involving the children in disagreements: The children are off limits when it comes to discussing marital conflicts. Neither parent should blame the other parent in front of the kids, nor should they ever ask children to take sides on any issue.
- Remain a parenting team: Regardless of where the children will live after the final divorce decree, they still need to view both parents as an unbroken link when it comes to love, rules and discipline. Children may try to take advantage of the situation, but they will benefit the most from recognizing the cohesive family structure.
Even Adult Children of Divorce Need Encouragement and Consistency
Even adult children are not immune from the effects that their parents’ divorce can have on their lives. At the very least, adult children may question the likelihood of achieving good relationships in their adult lives.
It is vital to work with Dallas divorce lawyers who understand the delicate nature of parent/child relationships, regardless of the age of the children. If you are considering filing for divorce, contact GoransonBain Ausley to learn more about the legal and emotional issues of the process.
This post was written by Patrick Kelly.